If you ask a person or two, in today's society, they may lean towards the concept that a partner must do something for them... otherwise what is the partner's purpose (at least as far as they are concerned)?
It is not always obvious, to quite a few people, that a good and healthy relationship is give-and-take. There will be times that one person may lean on or rely upon another person within a relationship. The tables can and will turn. The person who was doing the supportive role may need to rely upon or lean on the first person who needed to lean. It is only fair to provide a similar form of service.
Before we go down the path of the partner not being able to reciprocate, we will put a pin in that subject. That isn't the focus of this discussion and we will need to touch upon identifying capabilities within a potential partner, as well as ourselves. But that will be in another article.
Both parties truly need to understand the essentials that go along with the commitment in a relationship. Behavior should be fair. No one should take advantage of another for personal gain. If the act is to solely benefit just you, then be open with that tid-bit of information, allow your partner to know what they are dealing with. Give them the option to be of service to you rather than to be manipulated into anything.
Relationships are unique like the individuals in them. A relationship has the same complexities as each person involved in it. Of course, our relationships can and will resemble other people's relationships. Your friend's mate may do something just like your mate did. The results might even be the same from each mate. But please, don't treat your relationship the same as another; including previous relationships you have already had. Yours is unique and requires your focus to help it grow.
Earlier we touched upon being in a relationship because a person makes us feel good. And they should ~ their presence should make us feel wonderful. In fact, that person should make you feel good in a multitude of settings. We just have to remember that we can't keep the person solely for the-feel-good. If we are talking a good and healthy relationship, we are sharing our worlds ~ all parts of them.
Spending time with your Honey should fill you and build you. Those things can happen in slight ways. The development of a relationship may happen in grand fashion. However, more times than not, there is growth within a relationship, if allowed, at a minute level. And that is okay... Those small steps carry the relationship with forward progress.
As with anything in life, relationships come with positive times and not-so-positive times. That is just the make-up of life. The underlying them is sticking with it. It, in this case, is the relationship. Work all options within a relationship. Learn some things with your partner. See if you are really compatible with one another. If you are really compatible with one another, you may find that there is satisfaction in almost everything you do with your partner.
written by:
D. Barnes
part of the Understanding the Connection series
